Regret

Over our little over 2 year fiasco, I used words I knew would hurt him in probably every of the 3000 texts and emails I sent him. The ones that got reactions were words I learned were his insecurities. He constantly belittled my kids so on occasion I would go back at his. That is actually the only part I regret. I should not have stooped to his level. Oh well. It would bother him when I would touch on reasons all his relationships failed, telling him no wonder his EXes turned to drugs. One of the funniest ones - he was being extremely cruel so I only responded with "seems you lost your manners - they must be somewhere with your morals, your teeth and your erection" .... oh he did not like that. Our last communication was a fucked up apology email from him, almost after a year of no contact. His exact words were "dumby... if I ever hurt you I'm sorry. I wish you well" I did respond. I know I shouldn't have but I did. My response was "you didn’t hurt me. You abused me every single day and you enjoyed it. I'm not mad at you. I said this because I know that he enjoyed me being mad. I forgave myself for allowing your abuse but I will never forgive you. Then I blocked him on that email. The truth is, I'm not mad anymore. I really believe he does hope somewhere in his mind that he is full of regrets when his time comes. Sorry not sorry, but I do not wish him well at all. Take care.